Ellen Tyler With Ellen Tyler Coaching

Intro: [00:00:04] Broadcasting live from the Business RadioX studios in Atlanta, Georgia, it’s time for GWBC Radio’s Open for Business. Now here’s your host.

Lee Kantor: [00:00:18] Lee Kantor here. Another episode of GWBC Open for Business. And this is going to be a fun one. Today on the show, we have Ellen Tyler and she is with Ellen Tyler Coaching. Welcome, Ellen.

Ellen Tyler: [00:00:29] Hi, Lee. Glad to be here.

Lee Kantor: [00:00:31] Well, I am excited to learn about your practice. Tell us a little bit about your coaching practice, how you’re serving folks.

Ellen Tyler: [00:00:39] So, I like to say I help serve individuals who are trying to define what success means to them rather than to tell them what success should mean for them because it’s different for each and every person. But typically it’s around some business aspect that they’re just trying to get someplace they’ve never been before.

Lee Kantor: [00:01:00] Now, could they be an entrepreneur that has their own business? Could they be like a corporate executive that wants to move up the ladder or a variety of folks?

Ellen Tyler: [00:01:10] I think the variety of folks helps describe it the best way. If you think about a person’s role as an entrepreneur, they’re responsible for growing their business. As an executive, they’re responsible for their role, their division, and how they get from point A to point B in any given timeframe.

Lee Kantor: [00:01:34] So, now what’s your back story? How’d you get into this line of work? Have you always been a coach?

Ellen Tyler: [00:01:39] Not at all. In fact, I always like to say that we find our way and we find the solution when we’re not looking for it. And I left a few decades of working in financial services, which similar, I didn’t start out that way. And it was through the insight of one of my former managers who thought sales would be a good fit for this introverted, shy person. I’m not quite sure how that managed, but a couple of things. I’m a really good student. I’m very aware that other people have knowledge that will help me. And when you end up in financial services that you never thought you would, you realize, I should raise my hand and get a little bit of help. And it introduced me to the idea of what the heck a coach even does because I wasn’t raised in that environment. I went to school, picked a major. But it was the ability to identify that if I needed to uplevel my skills that there were other people who had the roadmap. And, I like to say that the transition was seamless, even though my peers in financial services would have thought me a little bit crazy. But in both instances, you’re helping people. In financial services, you have to wait for a financial event, and on the coaching side, I don’t have to wait for that. I get to help them at any stage along the journey.

Lee Kantor: [00:03:14] Now, so you were saying that you kind of invested in coaching in your career while your peers were not?

Ellen Tyler: [00:03:22] Yes. Look, I think it’s who you associate yourself with and how you identify the individuals that do well in business and you ask them questions. What did they do differently? Why are they having success and others aren’t? And sometimes sales is a really easy place to see that in any organization. You’ll have the superstars and then you’ll have the people who are just struggling to get by.

Lee Kantor: [00:03:50] And then, you found a correlation between the superstars and them getting either mentored or coached.

Ellen Tyler: [00:03:57] That and sometimes they would like to say their unconscious competence, but they recognized that there are different skills, that just because we went to school it doesn’t mean that somebody taught me how to have a sales conversation or how to prospect or get in front of people or what the heck a balance sheet looks like. All those different areas are places that we can benefit from asking questions and being a really good student.

Lee Kantor: [00:04:28] Now, in your practice, you focus a lot on helping people get better results. How did you kind of use that as your – how did that come about as kind of a lever for conversation or for just helping people get the outcome they desire?

Ellen Tyler: [00:04:43] Sure. So, when I thought about what it really meant as a coach for me and what the outcome was, I couldn’t have imagined that somebody could help me double or triple my income and stay in the same role. And even to this day, sometimes it sounds just a little bit impossible, but that’s truly the benefit of working with a coach, is to identify where do they want to get to, what type of outcomes would mean success for them.

Ellen Tyler: [00:05:19] Typically around income is why somebody comes in the door to begin with. And then, Lee, they also understand that if I can figure this out, how to increase my income, I can probably use this in some other areas of my life. I just chose the business side because I had spent such a long time in the business world as to what success looked like for most that I could speak their language. And it wasn’t that I was going to have to learn a whole new language with how to help people define success within the structure of what they do.

Lee Kantor: [00:05:55] And then, the good thing about sales and business is there are numbers. So, you know, that’s quantifiable. Like, you can say, I have X number of dollars today and then in 90 days, you know, I have X plus or X times the amount of money. Like, you can quantify it. How do you, how do you – is there a way that you can help somebody, a listener right now, at least take some baby steps when it comes to putting together some sort of an action plan or just, you know, some sort of a launching point to help them get the result that they would want. Is there something that you can share today that can put people on the right track?

Ellen Tyler: [00:06:41] Oh, absolutely. It’s one of the things that I love is being able to bring value to anybody where they sit today. And I sometimes talk about what is their – what is a 90-day action plan? So, somebody sitting here at the very beginning week of the third quarter I wish, second quarter, is looking at how do I get a little bit closer to the goal that I already set out? And, first is to ask a question. If it’s number of clients that defines where I’m trying to get to, so I’ll speak in the terms of somebody who’s just trying to reach X. If I want to add ten more clients today, then let’s back into that and create the action plan. So, the first question becomes, what’s the game plan? And if I want to add clients, it’s where do I find them? How do I get introduced?

Ellen Tyler: [00:07:37] You run through all the normal prospecting ideas that you can come up with. So, first is to lay out the game plan, but then it’s to break it down even further from that and narrow it in as to what is the one thing that they know if they focus on for the next 90 days that they’re certain because they’ve seen it work for them before, that it’s going to get them closer to having those X number of clients.

Ellen Tyler: [00:08:07] So, what is the one thing? It could be something as simple as consistently calling five people a day, showing up at networking. But just focus on one thing, because the challenge becomes in a 90-day plan is that we try to do too many things. So, have the game plan, focus on the one thing and then have a daily discipline each and every day for those 90 days.

Ellen Tyler: [00:08:34] And it’s to consistently track that daily discipline, whether it’s how do I start my morning? How do I contact people each and every day? What do I have to change to get to that? And then, most important at the end of the week is to review what the week has looked like to reflect on any changes that you might need to add to that and then repeat. So, it’s almost rinse, review, repeat. If anyone listening adheres to those five steps in their industry, game plan, focus, daily discipline, and review, repeat and rinse, they will hit where they want to go in 90 days.

Lee Kantor: [00:09:22] And is this part of your coaching process? You really help them hone in so they are being efficient and effective in executing that plan.

Ellen Tyler: [00:09:30] I would say yes. I like to tell my clients, look, you’re going to fall down. You’re going to need some help getting up. We’re going to dust you off and we’re going to send you down the right path again. It sounds so simple when I say it, but when each and every one of us tries to implement it, we’re going to hit bumps. And the best thing to understand is that when those bumps come, it’s how do we address them and just get right back to the game plan.

Lee Kantor: [00:10:00] And that’s what I think a lot of people don’t realize that a coach does. They’re there to catch them when they fall and get them back on track as quickly as possible, as opposed to if you’re on your own, one day becomes a bad week and that bad week becomes a bad month, and then that bad month, a bad quarter. And then, you had a plan last year. And it just kind of spirals out of control if you don’t have someone that’s, you know, holding you accountable and watching your back.

Ellen Tyler: [00:10:28] Very true. I think I heard and I wish I could attribute to where I heard this from, but it was a great description of coaching versus being exposed to training that a lot of the companies do, and I came from those companies so I understand it. It’s that when you’re in the audience, listening to a speaker, a coach, a motivational person, you’re being exposed to the idea. So, you’re exposed to the idea of what coaching does. But just as you said, I always say my job is, is that I hold you accountable so I will come and hunt you down if you’re not doing the work that you need to do, that you get to practice because there’s practice involved in that repetition, and then, you have repetition. And it’s having a guide who’s been there before, who understands that there is not perfect. Because if perfect happened, we all wouldn’t be going to goals, that we are going to learn to come out of that rabbit hole quicker than stay in it.

Lee Kantor: [00:11:30] Now, how do you help people who have never set a goal before that they may not even know how to begin this?

Ellen Tyler: [00:11:37] So, Lee, one of the exercises I give them, because here playing, if I ask them what’s your goal and they can’t answer that, there’s two different ways to start feeling like they’re getting closer. One is to ask, “Well, what don’t you want?” Sounds kind of crazy. But if I don’t want to be the bottom of the sales bucket, then that’s a really good way to start defining.

Ellen Tyler: [00:12:02] But the other is to start on an exercise that is going to take a little bit of time, and that is to list up to at least 50 and the goal is to try to get to 100 of personal and professional wants that you would like to have. The reason that the number is so large to help anyone is that the first 10 or 12 are the ones we’ve been taught by society to say, I want a vacation home. I’d like to go travel to Italy. I’d like to go around the world. And so, we have to get through those first ones to really start identifying what do we really want.

Ellen Tyler: [00:12:43] The next step for someone who has taken the time to do that is to take whatever number it is and, let’s say, it’s only 30 or even 15, is to divide those into three equal columns, from most important to least. Focus on that most important column because your goal is hidden in there and it’s wrapped around what’s important to you.

Lee Kantor: [00:13:08] And then, that helped you kind of hone in on once you know these things now it’s just a matter of doing that kind of relentless, persistent, daily discipline, the behavior that you need to do to just start knocking out these dreams and goals.

Ellen Tyler: [00:13:23] Right. And the other place that it helps you in is that it will give you the why do you get up in the morning and why do you really want to get to that goal? And, it’s to assign an accountability like who gets hurt. Because the problem with goals and that whole thing about, oh, my gosh, New Year’s resolutions, they don’t work because you’re not assigning why do you care so much about it.

Ellen Tyler: [00:13:49] So, for instance, I have five kids. I do everything so that I can improve their life and make sure that they are happy, contribute to society. And why do they get hurt if I don’t succeed is that they’re not going to have life experiences. So, I tell some of my clients, assign it to a Disney trip, which sounds crazy, but if you’ve ever taken kids to Disney, you know how expensive it is. But it is really who’s going to get hurt if you don’t make this goal because that’s the person you have to be accountable to at the end of the year.

Lee Kantor: [00:14:24] Now, is there anything that could be done for the person that may be subconsciously sabotaging themselves or maybe has some bad habits or behaviors that are preventing them from reaching their goals?

Ellen Tyler: [00:14:38] Always. In fact, that’s the bulk of the work that I do, is that I like to let people know that we cannot outearn our self-image, but our self-image is only what we accepted of the opinions and the evaluations of others. But habits are – you know, you’ve heard it takes 21 days to make a habit stick. Part of what happens with an individual who’s, let’s say I’m trying to go to the gym and I want to work out and I want to stop drinking sweet tea here in Georgia and replace it with water. Well, that’s all good and fine until I hit a day that I’m craving that drink that I used to love. And it’s the missing piece that most of these other, or I would say like, training programs miss is that, is to give yourself the ability to create a command, which is I replace sweet tea with water every day. I love to drink it and I drink eight glasses a day however it is. But it’s to give ourselves a command.

Ellen Tyler: [00:14:38] And, again, I’ll go back to that very beginning part, whereas they’re going to fall down, I’m going to fall down in my habit, but I’m going to give myself the command the very next day to instill that habit. And we don’t leave working on the habit until we’re sure that it’s moving us closer to the goal. And habits are important to understand. It should be an action step that will help us improve our life and get closer to where we want to be.

Lee Kantor: [00:16:19] Now, this Ellen Tyler Coaching methodology, is this something that you have just kind of put together over the years of having read and experienced life and have seen things? Or is this – are you following someone else’s kind of paradigm? How did you come about this kind of, you know, this almost a curriculum for success?

Ellen Tyler: [00:16:42] Yeah. I will say this because the curriculum that I use and the process and the system was the brilliant genius of Sandy Gallagher and Bob Proctor. Bob Proctor is no longer with us. We lost him a couple of weeks ago. And he would have told you that everything that we do and the way that we take people through this process is information that he gleaned from you can go through the books, Think And Grow Rich, The Science of Getting Rich, individuals like Dr. Thurman Fleet or JB Ryan from Duke.

Ellen Tyler: [00:17:24] And Bob Proctor had all this information in his head. Sandy Gallagher came along, brilliant merger and acquisition attorney, who decided she wanted to work with him and had the insight to take what was inside him because this is what he taught and to pull it out of him into this system. So, we always give credit that this is not something we created. This is not something that is only Proctor-Gallagher, but it was through the 60 years of research that Bob did into all these other individuals.

Lee Kantor: [00:17:58] So, now when you decided to kind of make this your career, this part of your career, when did you kind of start seeing that traction, those breadcrumbs that are saying, hey, I am on the right path?

Ellen Tyler: [00:18:12] Well, I think part of it is that to understand when we all take a leap and it doesn’t matter whether it’s going from financial services to coaching. The first thing is for myself and everybody is that decision, and the decision is this is going to be successful no matter what. It really comes down to persistence. And it’s asking the important questions, who do I want to help? And, how is that going to be successful for myself and my clients?

Ellen Tyler: [00:18:46] And I always give the story to my clients. Look, I have no insight into when we’re going to be locked down, but in 2019 I had been doing some coaching and I decided I was going to leave and do that full time. And then, it really was in 2020 because everybody had to pivot. Everybody had something that was put in front of them that they’ve not ever seen and they didn’t know how to navigate it, which was, it was like the perfect storm. It was the ability to relate to what they were going through and to be able to help them have a roadmap because nobody had the roadmap.

Lee Kantor: [00:19:29] And then what –

Ellen Tyler: [00:19:30] And that wasn’t easy.

Lee Kantor: [00:19:31] Right. So, you’re in this kind of a chaotic time and then you decided to kind of just lean into this direction. Rather than fight it, you just went with it and said, let me get – let me relentlessly pursue this. So, congratulations for, you know, also having that not only having the mindset to embrace it instead of, you know, battle it, but to, you know, kind of get the most out of it. That’s a big achievement. You should be very proud.

Ellen Tyler: [00:20:04] I am. I’m fortunate that I’ve always looked at how can we make this better? That’s really – that’s really it. How can we make this better? And one of the things I tell my clients, which I adhere to, Lee, is if I didn’t choose to make the jump when I did, I was going to hurt the clients that were looking for me.

Lee Kantor: [00:20:24] Right. The sooner you got into this, the more people you could help.

Ellen Tyler: [00:20:27] Right.

Lee Kantor: [00:20:29] Now, what drew you to GWBC?

Ellen Tyler: [00:20:33] Well, it was a client of mine. So, I was unaware that this was a benefit or an organization that really was honed in in helping those of us, female entrepreneurs, to really grow and expand our business and to really make a footprint. And, a client of mine was giving a presentation, speaking about her business, and that she said two major things happened, is that she had gone through this process of recognizing and organizing as a woman-owned business. Coupled with that, she was increasing her visibility and that her business just did that J curve and soared and took off. And I asked a very simple question, not being aware, I go, “Well, how many people need to be in this woman-owned business?” And she said, “One.” And I go, “Okay. Let me think about this. I care about the growth of businesses. I help all of my clients understand how to grow businesses. And you’re telling me there’s this organization that’s going to help me even more?” It was a no-brainer.

Lee Kantor: [00:21:48] And then, so you kind of researched it and then just took the leap in this area as well.

Ellen Tyler: [00:21:54] I researched it. I did everything that I needed to do. I’m a person who believes into participate because when – it’s no different than a sports team in school. You join it. You don’t know how to play the sport. You’re trying to figure out your role in it. And to get a better understanding is to jump in and participate as much as you possibly can without asking how.

Lee Kantor: [00:22:24] Right. I agree 100%. To get the most out of anything, it’s hard to dabble. You have to kind of go all in and immerse yourself and be part of the organization or whatever it is you’re trying to do. The more you’re involved, the better your chances of leveraging it to get the most out of it.

Ellen Tyler: [00:22:43] And I think for me it was, also because of the type of work I do, it’s also to ask how can I help you. So, when you think about all of the businesses that encompass this, it’s how can I help? Do I know somebody? Is there a skill that you need? Is it a way to comfortably expand? I tell people I collect relationships and I’m looking to see who can open doors for you. That’s the way I approach it.

Lee Kantor: [00:23:14] Now, have you identified kind of that opening point that point of first interaction that at least gives you a chance to get a new client or to learn about a new client? Is there something that happens first for you to – where a prospect can raise their hand and say, I’d like to talk to Ellen?

Ellen Tyler: [00:23:37] So, through a couple of different ways. But typically a person who’s thinking about that they can do better – it’s like perfect storm, Lee – is that I have opportunities where I get to speak in front of groups. I have opportunities where I get introduced to individuals. It’s that same philosophy is like, how can I help? I tend to describe it as if there’s somebody in these situations, if they’re an entrepreneur and they’re frustrated and they’re sitting in the 3 to 5 year and they’ve plateaued and they don’t know how to get past it, let’s have a conversation. And it’s in a sense, it’s having your warriors out there for you who understand the types of businesses that you like to help and being able to just ask those simple questions, would you like some help? What is the goal for your business? I think I know somebody who can help you get there.

Lee Kantor: [00:24:36] And then, you do talks as well. So, if there’s a team or an organization or group that would have you come in and speak, you do different talks about getting results and things like that.

Ellen Tyler: [00:24:46] I do. And it’s very simple. Some of the most requested topics are subtle things like if I know what to do, why am I not doing it? And I just tell people, I trained with the best. I trained with Bob Proctor. And all we want to do is get this information in people’s hands like that 90-day plan. And I think through those types of talks, people understand. We just want to help you have the tools at your fingertips so that you can do this because it works for everyone in every instance on anything that they want to get to. And I think it’s that approachability. It’s not – this is not a big secret. I will tell people exactly what to do. And if they want the accountability and the help along the way, then they raise their hand.

Lee Kantor: [00:25:39] Well, congratulations on all the success. And, thank you for sharing your story today.

Ellen Tyler: [00:25:45] Look, Lee, if it changes one person’s life and if one person sits there and goes, “Oh, shoot. It is the second quarter and maybe I should just come up with that game plan so it doesn’t happen, like you said, that it gets at the end of the year,” then this was the perfect conversation.

Lee Kantor: [00:26:03] And if somebody wants to learn more, have a more substantive conversation with you, what’s the website?

Ellen Tyler: [00:26:09] It’s ellentylercoaching.com.

Lee Kantor: [00:26:11] And they can connect with you there or I’m sure on LinkedIn and all the socials.

Ellen Tyler: [00:26:17] All the usual suspects.

Lee Kantor: [00:26:19] Well, thank you again for sharing your story. You’re doing important work, and we appreciate you.

Ellen Tyler: [00:26:24] Thanks, Lee. I’m glad to be here.

Lee Kantor: [00:26:26] All right. This is Lee Kantor. We’ll see you all next time on GWBC Open for Business.